My Sin

I went to a local church today and joined with thousands of other women by way of a simulcast to worship and be taught by Beth Moore.

Let's be serious....God had a lot to say to me. He just used Mrs. Moore as his mouthpiece.

My mind swirls with the knowledge and revelation that these ears were privy to today. I pray that God uses the soft soil in my heart today to plant many seeds of wisdom and understanding. Goodness knows I will need them in days to come. Any woman trying to fall in line with the demands of this life is sure to need all the help she can get.

Anyway, I hope to share more as God hashes it out with me in the days to come.

As the morning began we started out singing praises to God.

Something happened.

My heart and the sin that resides there was exposed.

God flat called it out.

Worry
Cynicism
Doubt
Jealousy
Anger

I have been a worrying, cynical, doubting, jealous, and angry mess for the past few weeks. Not that most of you would notice, mind you. I am as good as the next girl at dressing it up to look cute. Normal even. But just under the surface lies a bunch of brooding issues that I stay content to keep at a low boil.

The more I sang about the greatness of my God and all of His attributes, I was amazed at how BIG He became and how small these other things really are.

The truth is He is never small. My perspective just gets thwarted. I start believing what I feel instead of what I know. Then my mind follows the leading of my ever-wandering heart and I stay defeated.

Needless to say, I repented. And fast.

Instantly I was caught up with His scandalous love for me and I was undone and overwhelmed. My praise was effortless and I felt like I could have done it for a thousand years and it still wouldn't have been enough.

How is it that my sin doesn't keep Him away?

I keep Him away by refusing to deal with my stuff.

He knew I would have a blast worshiping Him and He also knew that I couldn't do it half-way. I had to be right in my heart for it to really be meaningful.

What a God!
What a Savior!
What a Friend!

As we sang one of my favorite songs I was reminded anew of why these past few weeks have seemed like I was smothering under quick sand.

"On Christ the soild rock I stand
All other ground is sinking sand."

He alone is solid enough for me to stand upon.

Everything else will leave me sinking into pits of depression and fear.

What are you standing on today?!?