Just a tiny little sore

can wreak havoc on a large space.

This is the case with my right hand at the moment. Actually for the past few days.

The skin around my thumb nail has split and created a tiny open sore.

How is it that this tiny open wound can affect me so much?

I am right handed so everything I touch or do in a typical day brings with it an unsettling pain.

Crazy isn't it?!?

You wouldn't think that such a tiny place could cause currents of sharp pain.

With my hurt thumb I dread the sight of soapy dish water...typing on the keyboard....dressing the kids or myself...preparing dinner...cleaning around the house.

But life goes on...a little sore can't stop us.

It can hurt us. Yes, that is true.

But life has to be lived. Things have to get done. You suck it up...grit against the pain...and keep going.

Does anyone else see a bigger story here?

This past Christmas was wonderful in many ways. We were surrounded by family and friends. We were in a warm house. We had yummy food to eat. We got to celebrate our Savior's birth. We got to experience the wonder of Christmas through our children's faces. But, just like my tiny little open sore, there was something amiss.

Another year passed by. Another Christmas. Another Thanksgiving. Another set of birthdays. Each day that passed on the calendar in 2010 was another possible day for God to heal my girl.

And He chose not to....

So, although we were so blessed there was also a bit of sadness.

We still believe that He has said He will heal her. But each day that passes....each year that passes....each holiday that passes.....just makes us have to cling tighter and believe stronger because what we want to do is give up.

This tiny sore on my hand pales in comparison to the rest of my body. But it hurts and it can affect my mood and what I choose to do and not do.

Our belief about Caroline is like this tiny open sore.

In the grand scheme of our lives...it is a tiny thing.

But it affects us deeply.

It hurts daily.

We have to constantly push past our fears and doubts and keep going. We can't stop because of this little tiny open wound~ we must go on in spite of it.

I look forward to the New Year with new hopes and I will continue to live as if any moment could be "the moment" that God chooses to heal our girl.

I pray it is soon.

For now we live with the pain of the little sore.

This little wound has changed us forever. We think differently. We live differently. We hope differently.

Isaiah 26:3-4

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the LORD, the LORD, is the rock eternal."