Longing

I enjoyed Bible study today. I always do...there is nothing unusual about that. Some people pay therapists to listen...I just spill out my guts to those precious women.

If you know me I tend to be an open book. I wear my feelings on my sleeve. My friends ALWAYS know if something is OFF with me.
These women and I have gone through so many studies together over the last 5 plus years...

They have heard my cries, frustrations, appeals, questions, answers, victories, moments of defeat, crippled faith, expectations, and hopefully some faith explosions.

I guess it is only appropriate that I get another "freeing" moment in the midst of these women again.

We are still studying Esther. We are in our 7th week. I never could have imagined the tremendous insights I have gotten from this study.
Today she (Beth) was ending the video session and she was encouraging those who are waiting. Waiting for whatever they believe God has told them He is going to do.

(ding. ding. ding. Caroline's healing)

Of course, my ears perked right up...she went on to explain there is always a longing during a wait. If there weren't a longing then it would not be a wait.
Without a longing for something there would be no faith, trust, or hope exhibited at all. The wait would simply be a passing of time.
It was incredibly freeing to me! So many times the enemy has lied to me and told me that my faith was weak because I longed for her healing.

During this wait for Caroline's healing....I long....oh, how I long for it!!

Beth also went on to admonish us about fretting and doubting. Lord knows I do my fair share of that. There is a difference.

Fretting and doubting shows lack of trust.
Longing shows strength and assurance of God's promise.

I need to hear that. I believe many Christians do. It is o.k. to pray and ask God for BIG things. He wants to be BIG and present in our lives. That doesn't mean He will bend to our every whim...He knows better.
We need to understand it is o.k. to have a longing for something...

Ps. 38:9 " All my longings lie open before you, O Lord; my sighing is not hidden from you." NIV

Prov. 13:19 "A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul, but fools detest turning from evil." NIV

Job 6:8 "Oh that my request might come to pass, and that God would grant my longing." NAS