In a bathroom stall...

At a recent parent-teacher conference, Shep and I sat and listened to Ava's teacher talk about her personality in the classroom and her accomplishments during her first grade year.

Speaking as a former teacher, she is a teacher's dream.

A desire to please is in her blood. She can't help it.

She wants to follow the rules.

She wants others to follow the rules.

She doesn't like conflict.

She is thrilled to receive praise and and she works hard to do a good job.

Don't get me wrong....she can be every bit as bratty as the next kid.

But, usually, at school she aims to please.

Then her teacher said something interesting, "Ava is very compassionate. She is very tender toward others. She is very concerned if someone is hurt or having a hard time."

Whoa.

Compassionate.

I don't think that was spoken about me at 6 years old.

Sassy? Yes
Chatty? Absolutely
Outgoing? For sure

Compassionate? Not so much

I certainly had compassion on hurting animals and the like but it wasn't something that stood out so that my teachers ever relayed it to my parents.

But then I thought about Ava's life.

She has had a calling from birth to be the little sister of a very handicapped older sister.

That is quite a task I tell you. And one she handles with as much grace as a 6 year old can.

She has always looked up to Caroline in her own way.
But she has always played a big part in her care giving.

This is where I believe God has begun the daunting task of molding and making Ava into the compassionate person she will always be.

Ava helps us with Caroline's diaper changing.
Ava helps us with trying to feed Caroline.
Ava helps us with wiping the drool from Caroline's mouth.
Ava does silly things to make Caroline laugh.
Ava will climb into bed with Caroline if she seems afraid.
Ava will catch a ride on Caroline's lap in her wheelchair just to be close to her.
Ava will guide Caroline's hands to help her color a picture.

Ava has had to take notice of all the care that Caroline requires. She doesn't really understand but what she does know is that Caroline can't help it. She must have our help.

It is through helping those who can't give you anything back that we grow and develop compassion.

All Caroline can give us is a smile....but her smile lights us up.

Not too long ago Ava told my mom about a situation that happened at school. She was in the bathroom stall. She heard a couple of other girls come in and began talking. She didn't know who they were but she overheard them saying mean and ugly things about Caroline. It is one thing to see kids staring at your sister but quite another to hear the mean words spoken. She was stunned and hurt. Embarrassed and sad, she just stayed in the stall until they left.

It hurt her on Caroline's behalf.

But, even then, God was working.

As her mother I wish I could save her from times like this. But there will be more.

She is God's child and He was with her. She won't soon forget this encounter or how it felt. I trust that these are the times when her heart is tendered even more. Pain has a was of peeling the hardness away and leaving us humbled.

Ava has asked Jesus to be her Lord and Savior and to live inside her. I am crazy to think that He is not hard at work making her into the image of His Son, Jesus. Isn't that His plan for all of us that trust in Him?

Sometimes we short sell our kids and don't think they are capable of grasping God-centered concepts. I think we are sadly mistaken. Jesus tells us over and over in His precious Word that we are to come to Him always like a child.

Unhindered by pride...
Unencumbered by rules of religion..
Unashamed of our need...

Some people may not want their kids to be known for their compassion but I wouldn't mind if that was always spoken about Ava...and me for that matter.

The definition of compassion-" a deep awareness of the suffering of another coupled with the wish to relieve it".

This definition reminds me of our commission as believers in Jesus. We are to be deeply aware of the lost and dying world around us and be compelled to share Jesus and relieve their suffering in His saving name.

Ephesians 4:32 "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."