Watching Repentance Happen

God loves to show me real life applications for biblical concepts.

Last Thursday He showed me what repentance really looks like. 

Zeke (my 4 and a half year old son) had been playing with a recently new hand-me-down toy.  It was a hard plastic hatchet that he loved.  He used it in pretend fights.  He used it to chop down anything in his way. If he wasn't using it in some type of pretend warfare...he was at least holding it lest his sister grab it up.

Because this hatchet was getting so much play time we warned him to be extra careful inside.  It really is more of an outside toy for Zeke's uses but we were fine for it to stay inside as long as Zeke understood and obeyed the rules.

-He could not "chop" on anything inside.
-He could not throw it inside.

(I realize these rules kind of take away all of the fun of the hatchet indoors.  But...they were best for everyone involved.) The last thing my furniture, walls, or face needs is a hard hatchet thrown at it.

Well...............................................................................................

You guessed it.  The inevitable happened.  Zeke's fun with his hatchet somehow eclipsed his memory of the rules.

He threw the hatchet and it left a nice mark and indention in the wall...minus a little paint.

Immediately his memory came back.

Guilt covered his face and he knew he had broken the rules.

He began to cry.

I got on to him and explained that breaking the rules ALWAYS has consequences.

He immediately began to worry about what his daddy's response would be.

After all...it was daddy who had told him that if he disobeyed the rules (after being warned repeatedly) that he would be punished.

He said, "Mommy, do you think daddy will spank me?"

I said, " Zeke I am not sure but you need to explain what happened.  Owning up to your disobedience is the best thing to do."

He disappeared as if on a mission.

When he came back he had written his daddy an "I'm sorry" note and stuck it on the hatchet.  Then he laid his beloved hatchet up on the kitchen counter as if offering it somehow showed the depth of his remorse.

He came to me every thirty minutes to ask when daddy would be home. 

 I asked if he wanted to call Shep and talk to him over the phone.

He shook his head yes.

As soon as Shep answered Zeke began his apology, "Daddy, I threw the hatchet.  It hit a little bit on the wall.  I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to."

Shep told him that they would talk more when he got home.

Finally Shep came through the door and Zeke was running to meet his daddy.  He explained that he had broken the rules.  He showed him where he hit the wall.  Then he handed him his hatchet with his written apology.

Shep spoke firmly to him about his disobedience but he ultimately showed him grace and mercy.  Hands that could have distributed punishment gave hugs instead.

What struck me was this:  Zeke couldn't wait to make it right with his daddy.  He didn't cross his arms and get mad for the rules.  He didn't make excuses about the rules.  He just felt sorry for breaking them.  Then he ran to his daddy and offered an apology.

As I watched it all play out I thought about the ways I go about repentance.

I usually get mad, feel sorry for myself, and put as much distance between me and God as possible.

That is a vast difference between the humble actions of my 4 year old.

Pride and humility will always be at war in our lives....repentance requires the harder of the two.

Lord, help me...